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Laura Jane's description of how it impacted her relationship with her wife in the first half of the episode was a very accurate portrayal of my own observations about the challenges of holding a pre-existing marriage together post-transition.However, the second half of the episode -- which dealt with dating -- presented an incomplete or potentially misleading picture of what dating (or attempting to find a date) is like for transgender women.Author of the recently released book, “Who Am I Without My Partner?Post-Divorce Healing and Rediscovering Your SELF,” Deborah Hecker, Ph. is a psychotherapist with over 35 years of private practice experience. In addition, she is certified as a psychoanalyst and has extensive training in the following areas: addiction counseling, grief counseling, collaborative practice and mediation. Almost everyone interviewed about the topic was younger and lives in large metropolitan areas with significant queer communities (Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Chicago).The reality of trying to date while transgender is far more difficult and complicated, however. The episode quotes a statistic that only 7% of marriages survive transition.
I’m just saying: date a man who is aware of the reality of the situation.Here are some key points of advice I’ve gleaned on the hunt for Mr. Listen up, sisters: Through the mazes of apps and dating profiles – yes, she’s guilty – consider their vocab a metaphorical traffic signal.Here is where I’m putting my Creative Writing degree to use: “green light” means he uses words like “transgender” and “transwomen”and is up-to-date on the North Carolina bathroom situation, the Orlando Pulse massacre, and other human rights issues.After all, what better way to privately seek other like-minded individuals without having to deal with disapproving family members, outing yourself to coworkers or even placing yourself in a dangerous situation?Just the logistics of having to find a gathering spot in some parts of the country made the online experience a no-brainer.